3. Taking temporary leave and considering part-time offer from KPOO
4. Uh, become chief of staff for Gavin Newsom --2018 Gubernatorial Run
5. Buy KGO Radio
6. Asks the listeners if he should buy another Mercedes for the dog
7. "Should I add another 'n' to 'Ronnn?"
8. Says he has a man crush on "Rama."
9. Officially changes name to "Mr. Softie"
10. Tells audience his Clark Kent is Copie.
See you at 11
Owens has his doctor on; announces he'll have procedure done to slow down advanced Parkinson's --asks listeners to ask questions. Are we supposed to state sympathy?
In shutting down its Silicon Valley Bureau, KGO Radio is essentially snubbing its nose at the core geographic tech center of the world.
More to the point, KGO is saying to its listeners; its clients; its few advertisers left that the Southbay is no longer an important entity to spend money and resources to concentrate on. KGO plans to "streamline" tech news and developments through its SF center on Battery. While that is functional and doable it shows tremendous short sight on a news operation that runs promos billing itself the "24-hour News and Information station." Hardly.
Said a longtime KGO staffer: "It shows disrespect for the brand." It also shows a white flag surrender for the San Jose area and Silicon Valley.
*THINK ABOUT IT: Three pretty good brands ever so tarnished for no apparent reason. KGO Radio tattered all for the sake of money by a bunch of guys that were born into money and managed to murder one of the greatest radio stations ever. Making matters worse the Atlanta bandits don't know a thing about radio. Checkmate.
*KTVU or Fox2: Early on I was complimentary of the new KTVU which was apprehended by Fox Network, notFox News--there's a big difference. The network of Rupert Murdock would surely not mess with one of the most successful TV stations in the land, right? Wrong. Because consultants have to make a living and justify their worth, they begin eliminating jobs and injecting their own ideas into how to make the company better, only KTVU didn't need any major fixing. They'd been doing fine, thank you, with a successful, albeit jaded franchise called "The 10 O' Clock News" and a phenomenally successful "Mornings on 2"--huge money makers to boot. Only with Fox taking over last year, things suddenly changed and nowadays, are changing.
Fox2 has suddenly asked anchors to talk during news segments. Some of the talk is quite necessary, some, rather forced and contrived, like insincere. There are those TV journalists that can make it look good, sincere; they can even fake it. Others, like Gasia Mikaelian, who's fine at reading a teleprompter, but hasn't grasped the fine art of ad-libbing. Viewers know when something doesn't sound right and seems gimmicky and there seeing a lot of that on Fox2.
Legitimate Breaking News; a fire, an earthquake, some terrorist attack, requires anchors and reporters to talk on the air without the benefit of scripted copy and notes. It's simple reporting and articulating on the fly and it's especially needed when there's lack of information coming out and the thirst for news is evident. Somerville and Haener can perform the chore; Castaneda is pretty good; Ken Wayne is a credible newsman who's worked the field --therefore ad-libbing is much easier.
The insert of happy talk into KTVU isn't, to me, the most problematic issue. I'm more concerned with Fox going hellbent into using KTVU News as a platform for its TMZ shows and other tabloid fare. I wasn't so naïve as to not expect it but I've nevertheless been blown away by how shitty it looks. Beyond the tacky nature of diminishing 2's special brand, it makes the anchor(s) look particularly schlocky --how can that help the product? Then again, I know, it's Fox.
*KRON: I'll say this about KRON. In spite of incredible odds, they still churn out fairly efficient, if not overly splashy, news for over ten hours a day. That they do so under the most dire of circumstance is a testament to some of the people over there. The station of Pete Wilson and Evan White has migrated away from the spiral staircase of 1001 Van Ness over to 900 Front. The cameras are still much too close to the anchors face; the lighting is still way too bright; the awkward banter between the bloated sports guy who still parks his used Bentley in the handicapped zone is on-air mush and frankly, an embarrassment, but the train wreck is at least somewhat entertaining even if he isn't anymore.
*Greg Kelly, KTVU GM: It would be better to get the memo from your predecessor --the silence card doesn't work --viewers --your viewers!--read this blog. Ignoring them says "we don't care what you think." Big mistake. The last guy who practiced that strategy ended up in Boston with the Boy Wonder ND.
*If KRON wanted some immediate credibility it would cost them about $200G a year. It's called hiring Tom Sinkovitz as an anchor and/or reporter. Don't hold your breath.
*Mark Curtis would be great on KGO-TV as its political reporter especially as we near the 2016 Election but Mark has a problem: he's white, middle-aged, intelligent, politically astute, and therefore, not hirable.
*Those of you that complain about my asking for donations from readers, simply do this: take a hike. Seriously. I have a question: What do you do? How do you make a living? Nobody put a gun to your head and forced you to come here. Yeah, how dare I ask for donations to make a living. Get outa here! Go listen to Ryan Scott.
*Speaking of donations, if everyone reading this right now donated 10 bucks we'd be able to curtail the pledge breaks for six months. Checkmate.
WE INTERUPT BREAKING NEWS AROUND THE WORLD; The Supreme Court has ruled, 5-4, that Same-Sex Marriage is legal in all 50 states; NY Law Enforcement is on the hunt for the last remaining prison escapee --the other fugitive was cornered and shot dead; Terrorists affiliated with ISIS have struck a French Power Plant; A gunman in Tunisia has killed 38; --in spite of these developments, KGO Radio, under the auspices of Cumulus Media, bring to you this Saturday Night, "Cooking with Ryan Scott."
1. Ryan tells you how to get giddy with arugula --complete with guest host, Cheswick Goudamouth
2. Ryan and Secret Asian Man play footsie with a pot of steaming Chinese broccoli --DUDE!
3. Ryan describes in detail to the vast KGO audience how he once became forklempt with Michal Bauer in the back of Liverpool Lulls.
4. Scott tells a story in which he and Ronn Owens seduce the manicurist on Union Street for a free pedicure in exchange for Scott's homemade Ukraine borscht --with extra red cabbage!
5. In a stunning display of culinary creativity, Ryan fondles a box of chocolate-covered strawberries simultaneously singing David Bowie's China Girl with Secret Asian Man!
6. Ryan invites John Dickey into the studio to make homemade TOAST!
7. Pissed off over word that Secret Asian Man is in studio, Mayor Ed Lee orders his tactical civilian squad down to 755 Battery to perform citizen arrest; undeterred, Scott rounds up 55 pounds of Kung-Pao Chicken and a case of PBR to Mr. Lee to soften blow. It works.
8. In outward rage over various people telling him to get the hell out of the studio, Scott threatens the entire newsroom of an hour of Maureen Langan unscripted.
9. To counteract move, Hangin with Langan chick infests studio with triple combo of Ronn Owens, Copie Copeland and Ronnnnnnn's latest gadget man, Iphone A Misto.
10. Secret Asian Man informs Ryan that he's actually Caucasian Jason Middleton --KGO's New Tech, Business, and Chinese Food Editor.
WE NOW GET YOU BACK TO REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAMMING
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So, the company that KILLED and MURDERED the greatest radio station in the Bay Area has begun a slash and burn program --jobs are being lost; people are getting laid off and fired. News people--from an operation that bills itself the "Bay Area's News and Information Station." Funny, I thought you needed news people to have a news station, maybe I'm missing something here, but oh well.
This new format that the past-greatest station's past big fish gleefully said "will be great" and mind you, "we have the best people--this is going to be great!" Tony the Tiger would have been mighty impressed (Grrrrr8T!)
So, how's this been working out? You have a radio station back in 2011 that was #4 in the market, billing roughly $37 Million and sales people drinking shots at the Old Ship; everybody getting wasted, everyone having a good time and the bottom line in fairly good order when suddenly, some dip shits in Atlanta decide they know more about radio even though they really don't know shit and proceed to really FUCK up something that didn't need anything. See, that's what guys in suits based in Atlanta do. They're rich because they inherited someone else's money and pay themselves obscene bonuses all the while screwing up the livelihood of people far more involved and ingrained in the company's big 415 flamethrower. And the worst thing, the most glaring element is the fact that these mental midgets don't know a damn thing about RADIO! They ruined KGO, WABC, KABC, need I go on? If there were a broadcasting wing of the World Court in The Hague these guys would be put out to pasture in an international setting. Tarred and feathered. Get out the canes.
To sit here today and fully comprehend what these dirty rotten scoundrels have accomplished is to, well, in a way, marvel at their mass incompetence --I mean, seriously, give these guys; these motley crew of mostly white, middle-aged guys that drink a lot of white milk and probably read a lot of porn in their hotels and mimic how wonderful they are; the same white guys that Ronn Owens posts pictures of himself on his Facebook page; to think that these mutants of mass destruction could have pulled all this off is stunning, damn stunning, but as Mr. Softie said repeatedly; with the temperament of a junior-high school glee participant, "Dammit, we needed to do this!"
THAT'S RIGHT : Let's fuck something up that wasn't broken.
Let's FIRE some newspeople after we FIRE some talk hosts as we systematically disintegrate into a #24 station in the market that literally CANNOT GIVE AWAY FREE SPOTS!; that has NO News Director, NO Program Director (for the most part), not one thing or program redeemable other than a new studio and office building on Battery that will probably be locked over when the feds decide to regulate radio stations and their means of operation through their stockholders, the few of them left.